Dear Hooters Waitresses

Okay, I get it, you're there to make money and flaunting your tits and ass in front of men is a great way to do that. I know, I was a cocktail waitress and a bartender and I understand how it works...tits and ass and a bubbly personality equal lots of cash tips. However, you need to learn how to work a table properly and know when your patrons are done hearing you drone on about how you're just working your way through college or whatever other stupid thing you're boring us with. It's one thing to be entertaining and quite another to be annoying.

Here's a tip, when the table is carrying on a conversation of its own and only stopping to tell you what kind of dipping sauce they want with their wings...walk away and just place the order because we're busy talking about something more important than whatever it is that you have to contribute. We don't want to hear how much you love Farmville on Facebook and we really don't care what your kid did the other day that was sooooo cute. Just get our fucking wings, refill our drinks, bring us the check, and we'll give you a decent tip anyway. Save your boring 24 year old chit-chat for those horny frat boys who will be coming in around 8 o'clock tonight and are only listening to your nonsense chitter-chatter because they want to get into your pants...oh wait, I take that back, they're not listening to you either, they're just looking at your hooters!

Thank you.